Keeping our Children Innocent

I am officially a duel major in English Technical Writing and Studio Art...with my primary college the Preforming and Visual Arts College. *sighs* its almost done...now all i have to do is get the hold taken off of my transcript so I can register. Which means i need to figure out my schedule and have it approved by the undergrad advisor in the art department. I'll put it together this weekend and have my meeting with her next week. I can't register until the 17th anyways so, as long as I can do this soon i'll be happy.

It is hellishly windy! We have been having horrible dust storms lately! It just shows why i hate Lubbock so much! Oh, which reminds me. I did my english peer review and one of the papers i got made me laugh so much. If you know me well enough you will know why. I couldn't stop laughing to write the first sentence to the review. The paper was about how porn is a problem and that the church should do something about it. The person was a dumb ass. I was laughing so hard that at the end of the review, i put my email address for this person to contact me for further dicussion. This paper was pretty much from the point of view of a West Texas Conservative Church-goer. The last sentence in the paper went along the lines of: "the church needs to take action and I think society will respond positively inorder to keep our youth innocent." *laughs* oh, i'm so bad...i'm horrible...and i blame Joey! *laughs* He would be so proud of my responces to this person...pretty much i said: "you are so one and short sighted" very nicely. This is what i said:

1. ARE YOU CONVINCED THAT THE WRITER’S PROBLEM IS TRULY SIGNIFICANT AND THE
SOLUTION REASONABLE SOLUTION? JUSTIFY YOUR ASSERTION WITH SPECIFIC EVIDENCE
AND/OR SUGGESTIONS.



I do not belive that the problem presented
is well rounded in its argument. The solution is extreemly short sighted and
will not be effective. Pornography is regulated in the professional field. It is
the off market porn that is not regulated. There undercover police who try to
shut down illigal porn cites and activities. I do not agree with the sigificance
of the problem stated. I believe that porn is what one precieves it to be. If
one believes it to be tabboo and shield themselves from it, that is thier
choice. That choice cannot be forced upon other people.





2. ARE YOU CONVINCED BY THE SUPPORT THE WRITER HAS
PROVIDED? WHAT WOULD YOU SUGGEST THE WRITER DO TO FURTHER SUPPORT THE ISSUE AND
ITS ARGUMENTS AND COUNTERARGUMENTS?



The support provided does
assist the argument provided. I would use more facts from professionals, like
quotes. Lexis Nexis has many articles that will help with your topic. I cannot
say that I am convinced because I believe the complete opposite of the argument
proposed. For counter arguments: many people believe that porn is not a problem.
They belive that people should be exposed and educated about it so that they can
come up with a personal decision about porn. Many people believe that porn is
not necessarily harmful if you keep it as exactly what it is ment to be: not an
addiction but as an entertainment venue or as a personal educational experiance.
Porn is what it is, nothing more. People who are scared and do not understand it
make it a big deal. People who are involved in it are not ashamed with what they
do and do not make a big deal out of thier industry. Take into account that
college students are vastly the majority of people involved in off market porn.





3. WHAT ARE THREE OR FOUR *SPECIFIC* SUGGESTIONS YOU
WOULD GIVE TO THIS WRITER TO IMPROVE HIS/HER PAPER? BE SURE TO INCLUDE YOUR
REASONING FOR MAKING THESE CHANGES; WHY WILL THEY MAKE THE PAPER BETTER?



1. "As a church, if pornography is given attention to as a
problem, I believe society will respond positively..." This will not happen. The
majority of the population will not respond lightly to something dentramental
towards porn. This is a fact: many male church figures including musical artists
are active porn viewers. Promise Keepers address this in thier siminars.



2. You state, "Pornography is an extremely ignored..." yet you
go on to say, "pornography industry is such a huge source of revenue, that
people find it hard to challenge the industry out of fear of loss of a paycheck
or of damaging the economy." This is contradictory to itself. If porn is ignored
then why is the vast majority of people afraid to effect the economy? That is
not ignoring anything.



3. "it is an un-deniable fact that
society needs to be aware of, come to grasps with..." Society is already aware
of porn and has come to grasps with it. That is why there are streets like
Westhimer in Houston that are lined with fetish shops. Also, movies like Sin
City have come to grasp with explicit scenes.

I'm so so bad. Its so ammusing! Well, i'm off! *huggles*

-Reijn